Of Guilt Complexes
Aug. 4th, 2007 03:44 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cutthroatpixieTitle: Of Guilt Complexes
Author: McKenzie
Pairing: Selene/Jeremy
Prompt: #37
Rating: PG
It is a scary thing when Selene gets angry. When she's just being her normal old frustrated self, she'll rant and rave and carry on about whatever it is pushing her buttons. But when she gets angry... that is a whole other thing altogether. You do your best not to make her mad at you, but you can never quite manage to keep your mouth and actions that in check.
When she is angry with you, she'll look at you with those piercing eyes of hers in a cold, vacant way that blames you for all her troubles in life. She makes you feel like a guilty, wretched, horrible person all with a single glance. She doesn't say anything because she doesn't have to. You know what you've done and you are going to pay your penance.
She doesn’t yell at you, or complain to anyone else even. She won’t even give you that luxury she is so angry, and the silent treatment you receive from her is far worse than any amount of torture anyone else could ever put you through. She’ll stew in her room, completely ignoring you, and you’ll go on feeling horrendously guilty as she quietly gets over whatever it is you’ve gone. She might yell at you later, but by then she’s over it and you’ve completely drown in your remorse. She says she forgives you, and you believe her, but you’ll never completely forgive yourself.
It is an even scarier thing when you make Selene sad. The looks she gives you reek of sorrow. She's overdramatic, of course, but you still feel like the most horrid person on the planet, because you took the smile off her face and everything is all your fault. No amount of repentance can grant you forgiveness and you are going to burn forever in a hell you do not even believe in, just because you couldn't keep her happy.
She’ll lock herself away for a few days as you and your conscience tear one another apart, and when she finally stops pouting you’ll beg her forgiveness over and over and over again, until she punches you in the arm and tells you to, “Shut up, you ass, you’ve nothing to apologize for,” but you’ve got some sort of guilt complex; of course you’ve got something to be sorry for. You continue to apologize, just not out loud.
You eat yourself up over things she’s forgiven you for months ago. “Why couldn’t I just keep my mouth shut?” you ask yourself. “Why do I have to be such an ass all the time?” She’ll tell you, of course, that all the guilt tripping is insane and useless, but you just can’t help yourself.
She's mute and silent quietly gets over her anger or her sadness, and eventually everything will be back to normal (for her), but every time you look into her eyes or anytime there is silence ringing from her pretty mouth (and oh how it rings) you'll remember your sins against her, and that is something you'll never escape.
Author: McKenzie
Pairing: Selene/Jeremy
Prompt: #37
Rating: PG
It is a scary thing when Selene gets angry. When she's just being her normal old frustrated self, she'll rant and rave and carry on about whatever it is pushing her buttons. But when she gets angry... that is a whole other thing altogether. You do your best not to make her mad at you, but you can never quite manage to keep your mouth and actions that in check.
When she is angry with you, she'll look at you with those piercing eyes of hers in a cold, vacant way that blames you for all her troubles in life. She makes you feel like a guilty, wretched, horrible person all with a single glance. She doesn't say anything because she doesn't have to. You know what you've done and you are going to pay your penance.
She doesn’t yell at you, or complain to anyone else even. She won’t even give you that luxury she is so angry, and the silent treatment you receive from her is far worse than any amount of torture anyone else could ever put you through. She’ll stew in her room, completely ignoring you, and you’ll go on feeling horrendously guilty as she quietly gets over whatever it is you’ve gone. She might yell at you later, but by then she’s over it and you’ve completely drown in your remorse. She says she forgives you, and you believe her, but you’ll never completely forgive yourself.
It is an even scarier thing when you make Selene sad. The looks she gives you reek of sorrow. She's overdramatic, of course, but you still feel like the most horrid person on the planet, because you took the smile off her face and everything is all your fault. No amount of repentance can grant you forgiveness and you are going to burn forever in a hell you do not even believe in, just because you couldn't keep her happy.
She’ll lock herself away for a few days as you and your conscience tear one another apart, and when she finally stops pouting you’ll beg her forgiveness over and over and over again, until she punches you in the arm and tells you to, “Shut up, you ass, you’ve nothing to apologize for,” but you’ve got some sort of guilt complex; of course you’ve got something to be sorry for. You continue to apologize, just not out loud.
You eat yourself up over things she’s forgiven you for months ago. “Why couldn’t I just keep my mouth shut?” you ask yourself. “Why do I have to be such an ass all the time?” She’ll tell you, of course, that all the guilt tripping is insane and useless, but you just can’t help yourself.
She's mute and silent quietly gets over her anger or her sadness, and eventually everything will be back to normal (for her), but every time you look into her eyes or anytime there is silence ringing from her pretty mouth (and oh how it rings) you'll remember your sins against her, and that is something you'll never escape.
